fragil beauty

carpe Diem Tanka Splendor #19 Teika's 7th Tanka Writing Technique "clever treatment" (prompt: fragile beauty)


wind
blasts through the fallen leaves
once more
raked into perfect piles
now crowned with curls of smoke

©  petra domina

Thanks to Chèvrefeuille for daily prompts on 

CARPE DIEM HAIKU KAI








Comments

  1. Helene VaillantNovember 19, 2016 at 3:52 AM

    How lovely this is. Well done

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. JaniceNovember 19, 2016 at 1:43 PM

      Thank you. Not sure if I have the fragile beauty captured. Own worst critic are we poets!

      Delete
  2. Yamini MacLeanNovember 19, 2016 at 5:14 AM

    Hari OM
    Interesting... my nose twitched as I swear I could smell it!!! YAM xx
    (love the new banner!!!)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. JaniceNovember 19, 2016 at 1:50 PM

      The banner is a photo I shot in 2005 as we were driving in traffic crossing the Susquehanna River in Harrisburg, PA. I photoshopped the shot to have it level, removed the banister and replaced with reflections. Then we had it printed on artist's canvas and it has hung in our living area since about 2006.

      Delete
  3. UnknownNovember 19, 2016 at 10:25 AM

    Yes, I agree..what was misding was the smell of smoke_, byt in reality it eas there, even if if not rxokicitly stated. Well done.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. JaniceNovember 19, 2016 at 1:53 PM

      Thanks for the comment, Hamish. The smell of burning leaves is different than wood fires, etc. The leaves have now mostly fallen here and are blowing all over the parking garage. Not enough to rake and burn, though!

      Delete
  4. UnknownNovember 19, 2016 at 10:26 AM

    Yes, I agree..what was misding was the smell of smoke_, byt in reality it eas there, even if if not rxokicitly stated. Well done.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Adas AlcoveNovember 19, 2016 at 8:50 PM

    Nicely done!

    ReplyDelete
  6. AnonymousNovember 20, 2016 at 4:23 PM

    I think this lovely, and the end does denote 'fragile beauty'.
    Lady Nyo (Jane)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. JaniceNovember 20, 2016 at 5:02 PM

      As noted in my email to you, still learning.

      Delete
  7. Pat RNovember 21, 2016 at 4:41 PM

    I love this, especially that last line. I'm still trying to figure out 'fragile beauty' myself:) A nice job.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. JaniceNovember 21, 2016 at 6:42 PM

      Thanks, jazzy! It was a good prompt to give the brain a workout.

      Delete
  8. Pat RNovember 21, 2016 at 4:41 PM

    I love this, especially that last line. I'm still trying to figure out 'fragile beauty' myself:) A nice job.

    ReplyDelete

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